Love yourself as much as you want to be loved

SELF LOVE is challenging for many women.  I deal with this subject as a trainer of females and as a female myself.  Why do we constantly judge ourselves or compare ourselves to other women?  Why do we request validation from others to make us feel ok with the way we look?

JUDGING how we look on a daily basis is not healthy.  I'm giving you permission to get off your own back for awhile.  If you are not happy with the way you look, ask yourself what makes you feel that way.  Is it a vision of your previous self that you want to acheive or are you simply COMPARING
yourself to other women?  

I had a killer body years ago.    Even after having my daughter, my body bounced right back.  After my son, it is different.  I've accepted that my body has to change and age.  My once tight and plump skin has changed over the years. My ass is not as bubbly as it once was and my skin on my stomach is not going back to its original tightness.  

​My skin has started showing signs of too much sun.  My face is getting wrinkles.  My HUGE forehead is still huge and now has creases that age me.  

As I'm saying all of this, I'm sure some of you that know me are saying, "What is she talking about, she looks fine."  

Guess what?

Everyone else is thinking the same thing when you point out all your flaws.  And are they  even FLAWS?

Is there a standardized body type that we should all be trying to acheive?  

I'll admit that when I see a client, I judge them.  It's actually my job to do so.  But it's not about some unrealistic standard that I am comparing.  It is about

HEALTH.

And that is the only thing that should be judged.  Yes, maybe you are not as thin as you once were.  Maybe those beautiful babies that you birthed left you with some battle scars.  Those things do not factor into your health.  All of those things I listed about myself are superficial and vain.  None of them affect my health.

I recently had a client come to me and request to lose a little around the middle and improve her butt and thighs.  This client was 20% body fat and in a healthy range on all of her measurements.  From my perspective, she looked beautiful.  But to her, it was devastating that she had a little extra here and there.   

Most women would kill for her body.  But her image of herself was skewed because of her emotional attachment to her own body.  

VALIDATION

How often do we ask our significant other that one question? "Do I look fat in this?"  We are seeking a validation.  But how many times do we hear what we want to hear, but still think we look bad?  We may even think that we were told a lie to prevent hurt feelings.  We are so convinced of how horrible we look, that we can't accept a compliment.  I've been there myself.  

We can't expect others to help us improve our self-image.  

WE HAVE TO LOVE OURSELVES AS MUCH AS WE WANT TO BE LOVED

If not, we will never be ok with ourselves.  We will seek constant validation that will be given in vain.  

ACCEPT WHAT WE CANNOT CHANGE

Give yourself permission to love yourself and know you are worthy!